Delivered From the Den of Desperation
4/20/2018
The eyes of the Lord are on me, and His ears are open to my cry... When I cried out, the Lord heard, and delivered me out of all my troubles!
Psalm 34:15,17
Many warriors are facing intense opposition and warfare right now, and our family would be in that camp of those who have been under attack. On Friday, April 13th, I was utterly exhausted, and I cried out to the Lord in desperation, frustration, and irritation as to why he delivered our family in a relational and spiritual wasteland! We moved to this place in obedience to the Lord's direction for our family a little over six years ago leaving behind a vibrant, life-giving community relationally, spiritually and emotionally. Wanting to be where God called we packed up and made our transition to what would be our new home. Even after the devastating passing of our son, Sterling, we knew we were to remain where we are instead of moving back to where the majority of our support system resided.
Even though we are far south on the west gulf, there is no southern hospitality here! Most people are not reciprocal, engaging or interested in doing authentic community. In fact, most don't know what that looks like because they've never experienced it. We desire to make new friends, but after numerous attempts, I have become discouraged and exhausted at the futile efforts.
So for this highly relational, connecting, people loving lady this has been a living hell of sorts.
As a family, we are being stretched and challenged in every area of life. As God continues to prepare us for a new ministry He is birthing, my yearning for my community has only heightened. The warfare in our home continues to intensify as the Trinity prepares each of us for our eternal assignment which is about to burst forth.
Where are the people to do life daily life in this place? My southern tribe knows how to do authentic Jesus life together. We get in the trenches with one another armed for battle blasting the adversary with authority given and prepare in readiness for the next onslaught. Each one knows what it is to be fighting and wield their swords against the weapons of the enemy independently, as well as, a unified army. We collectively bring in our resources fortified to take over the opponent's modus of operation. And in the interim, we are faithful to pray for each other.
After living with such a valuable community, I struggle with the absence of it when the enemy comes to wipe out my family. It increases my desire to be with my tribe of sisters/ brothers in the faith to sit, cry, hug, pray, process and provide comfort in person. Nothing like the tribe who knows the details of your life and enter without question or reserve. They know YOU, your walk, your confidence in the Trinity so when they see you weakened, broken and down for the count they know the drills to RESUSCITATE and call on the mighty name of Jesus and His army!
So last Friday when I flatlined, I cried out to my Father and wept from the time I awoke until afternoon. I did not cease making my requests known to the Lord. As I wailed out in desperation, my Father did the most incredible unbelievable acts a Father could do!
As I was sitting alone with Him trying to eat a friend called me. I answered, and she said, " Marcia are you alright?" and I responded, "No, I am not!!!" The Holy Spirit had instructed I call her earlier in the morning, but when she did not pick up, I did not leave a message as I knew she was probably working. While at work she saw I had called and was instructed by the Holy Spirit to call me back. We talked about the battle we were undergoing, and she said, " I need you to go to Barnes and Noble's and get the book, The Secret Power of Speaking Gods Word by Joyce Meyer and read it out loud for an hour every day. I started crying because I was sitting right in front of Barnes and Noble while eating. I am never even in that part of town, but God had directed me to be in that very place. Through my tears, I was praising and rejoicing with thanksgiving for a Father who loves so individually and for my dear friend who met me in my despair, ministered to me, prayed over me and provided new tools for the battle.
I picked up the book and while on the way home another friend with whom I do not talk with that often called and asked, "How are you?" I expressed to her at least I could talk whereas earlier I couldn't have through my sobs. Without asking anything else, she wanted to know what I would be doing toward the end of the following week as she wanted to fly down and spend a couple of days with me. I was ecstatic about her staying with us, and she responded, "NO, I'm getting a hotel and taking you away for those days!" I burst into tears as Scott, my husband, had just said earlier that morning, "I hope God provides an opportunity for you to get away for a few days as you need it!" I shared with my friend she was the immediate answer and provision of our God.
My Father had heard the desperate pleas of His daughter choosing to answer in ways to impart spiritual support, a new resource to do battle, the physical presence of one of my tribes, and providing a haven for renewal and restoration.
As if that weren't enough, I would be meeting in person for the first time my intercessory phone prayer partner/friend of over two years, as well as, spending time with my daughter over the weekend. My Father had already made the arrangements knowing what this child of His needed.
The time with my friend, my daughter, and her roommate was full of laughter, fun, food, great conversation, fellowship, encouragement, and prayer. My Father provided ways specific to my soul to be replenished, ministered to and energized during the next twenty-four hours!
God provided the following for:
To be with my daughter and a treasured friend who know and love me unconditionally.
To have great life-giving conversations with an eternal purpose.
To enjoy guacamole at a family vacation spot and eat homemade ice cream while sitting outside taking in the beauty.
To walk on the beach barefooted, and stand before the roaring ocean watching the tumultuous waves form, crash and roll into the surf while admiring the blue hues of the water.
To see the sun begin to melt behind me as the colors and sounds of life sang its closing chorus of another day of God's creation winding down!
And lastly, I had the opportunity to worship the Trinity with my daughter in church and be with some of my eternal family. What gracious love from my Father as He infused life back into these dry bones!
Just as the Lord heard me, He hears you too! If you are in the pit of despair, cry out and let Him come and minister to your soul. He reminds us in Psalm 57:2-3
I cry out to God Most High,
to God who fulfills his purpose for me.
He will send from heaven and save me;
he will put to shame him who tramples on me.
God will send out his steadfast love and his faithfulness!
Take comfort in knowing our Father will minister to you in ways unique to your soul just as He did for me! I love you sweet ones and am cheering you on in Jesus' name!